In the interest of community, I started a message board for women who have come out later in life. I've run into a number of us in my travels and I decided it was high time those of us who are local had a virtual place to congregate. Hopefully we'll even have an actual place to congregate and talk soon.
And even if you aren't a late bloomer, just struggling with being gay in the Queen City or just looking for some new friends feel free to stop by. The site is QueenCityLesbigaggle.myfreeforum.org.
La Marmot
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Her assed
I have a love/hate relationship with MySpace. Sure it’s a good way to keep in touch with friends and there’s all those great quizzes and tests to pass the time. But it’s also very cliquish and has the maturity level of the ninth grade … and there’s all those quizzes and tests that are such time vampires. Ahem.
One of MySpace’s latest tools to keep up with your friends is a little application that compares your Friends List with the Friends List of the people ON your Friends list. Say that three times fast. The application then coughs up people you might know in common that you haven’t already “friended.”
In theory, I’m sure this little app is very useful and sometimes helpful. However, in the incestuous lesbian dating world it can also be painful.
I wandered into the living room yesterday afternoon and the GF was chuckling. “Guess who MySpace thinks I might want to friend?”
Tired from a workout, I shrugged. She gave me a few hints. I was a bit slow on the uptake but then it dawned on me that it was HER.
In our dating lives, we all have that one “special” someone. The person we regret ever having thought was worthy of our time or even just hot. The person you may have had sex with twice, but gave you a lifetime of grief. In other words, HER.
I shook my head. “What picture did she have up?”I asked bemusedly.
The GF chuckled, “Her posterior in a short skirt.”
A number of wry remarks tumbled forth in my brain before I said, “So she’s showing her good side?”
One of MySpace’s latest tools to keep up with your friends is a little application that compares your Friends List with the Friends List of the people ON your Friends list. Say that three times fast. The application then coughs up people you might know in common that you haven’t already “friended.”
In theory, I’m sure this little app is very useful and sometimes helpful. However, in the incestuous lesbian dating world it can also be painful.
I wandered into the living room yesterday afternoon and the GF was chuckling. “Guess who MySpace thinks I might want to friend?”
Tired from a workout, I shrugged. She gave me a few hints. I was a bit slow on the uptake but then it dawned on me that it was HER.
In our dating lives, we all have that one “special” someone. The person we regret ever having thought was worthy of our time or even just hot. The person you may have had sex with twice, but gave you a lifetime of grief. In other words, HER.
I shook my head. “What picture did she have up?”I asked bemusedly.
The GF chuckled, “Her posterior in a short skirt.”
A number of wry remarks tumbled forth in my brain before I said, “So she’s showing her good side?”
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
I love the smell of patchouli in the morning
I was barely awake, pre-coffee and just trying to prepare my breakfast sandwich in the break room at work. Why do they ALWAYS sneak up on me at those moments?
A co-worker meandered in and loudly sniffed the air. She looked pointedly at me.
“Are you wearing patchouli?”
I could hear Maggie Bitter groaning in sympathy. (And yes I know only Karen gets that joke)
“No,” I said, hoping that would end it. I’m such a foolish dyke.
She stepped closer, “Are you sure? I swear I smell patchouli.”
While I don’t wear patchouli, I do use a sea salt soap that has a very distinct fragrance. I told her as much, prompting her to grab my shirt and take a big whiff.
“It smells really nice,” she said, and then gave me a look.
I wanted to scream, “Do you NOT have the first concept of personal space?? Do you not see the BAND on my left hand? We’re you dropped on your head as an infant??!”
But even I know discretion is the better part of valor. I told her about the store where I got it and told her how to get there. Then I grabbed my sandwich from the microwave and ran.
I’ve been taking a breakfast that doesn’t have to be heated these days. It’s just safer that way.
A co-worker meandered in and loudly sniffed the air. She looked pointedly at me.
“Are you wearing patchouli?”
I could hear Maggie Bitter groaning in sympathy. (And yes I know only Karen gets that joke)
“No,” I said, hoping that would end it. I’m such a foolish dyke.
She stepped closer, “Are you sure? I swear I smell patchouli.”
While I don’t wear patchouli, I do use a sea salt soap that has a very distinct fragrance. I told her as much, prompting her to grab my shirt and take a big whiff.
“It smells really nice,” she said, and then gave me a look.
I wanted to scream, “Do you NOT have the first concept of personal space?? Do you not see the BAND on my left hand? We’re you dropped on your head as an infant??!”
But even I know discretion is the better part of valor. I told her about the store where I got it and told her how to get there. Then I grabbed my sandwich from the microwave and ran.
I’ve been taking a breakfast that doesn’t have to be heated these days. It’s just safer that way.
A year older and bitchier
Oh, hello. Yes, I know, where the hell have I been? All apologies, but my time hasn’t exactly been my own of late. That and I had a birthday last week.
The GF and I went out for a celebratory birthday dinner as a matter of fact. She took me to Kai, because that’s my favorite place and she’s cool like that.
We arrived a few minutes early and our table wasn’t ready. We went to the bar, as instructed, to wait. A few minutes later another couple came and sat next to us.
The man started in immediately, “Did you see what those idiots in California are doing? The voters voted against Prop 8 and now they’re fighting it …” he trailed off because at this point I was staring at him. He looked at his feet. Fortunately, the hostess came and got him and took him to his table.
Unfortunately, when they came and got us, they put us at the table right next to him. If you’ve never been to Kai, the tables are mere inches apart. It’s a cozy place.
This could be a story about discrimination or being treated poorly by some jackass straight man, but I’m happy to report it isn’t.
Instead of being intimidated and uncomfortable, the GF and I continued our conversation. We traversed a number of current topics and when Jackass wasn’t treating our waiter like dirt he was glowering that we two uppity lesbians were proving that we were just a couple just like he and his wife.
Then the hostess brought an obviously gay man and his female dining partner up and seated them at the next table. By now, Jackass was fuming. He continued to take his ire out on the waiter.
The final straw was when our food was brought to the table. Of course, two of our dishes were flaming and Jackass’s wife could not help but ask us what they were. He glared at her as if her talking to us might give her a case of the gay.
He barked at the waiter to bring his check. They had barely finished eating. While I didn’t clap when he left, I did chuckle loudly.
And speaking of married couples, I mentioned I’d been a twee busy of late. The GF and I are in the process of planning a commitment ceremony. Now, now, no ugly emails about burying the lead.
The announcement comes lately and quietly in the post for a reason. It’s going to be a very quiet event. The GF and I are, as a friend quipped, not exactly people people. We’re having a very small ceremony with just family at my parents' home. We plan to celebrate big with friends a little later on this summer.
The GF and I went out for a celebratory birthday dinner as a matter of fact. She took me to Kai, because that’s my favorite place and she’s cool like that.
We arrived a few minutes early and our table wasn’t ready. We went to the bar, as instructed, to wait. A few minutes later another couple came and sat next to us.
The man started in immediately, “Did you see what those idiots in California are doing? The voters voted against Prop 8 and now they’re fighting it …” he trailed off because at this point I was staring at him. He looked at his feet. Fortunately, the hostess came and got him and took him to his table.
Unfortunately, when they came and got us, they put us at the table right next to him. If you’ve never been to Kai, the tables are mere inches apart. It’s a cozy place.
This could be a story about discrimination or being treated poorly by some jackass straight man, but I’m happy to report it isn’t.
Instead of being intimidated and uncomfortable, the GF and I continued our conversation. We traversed a number of current topics and when Jackass wasn’t treating our waiter like dirt he was glowering that we two uppity lesbians were proving that we were just a couple just like he and his wife.
Then the hostess brought an obviously gay man and his female dining partner up and seated them at the next table. By now, Jackass was fuming. He continued to take his ire out on the waiter.
The final straw was when our food was brought to the table. Of course, two of our dishes were flaming and Jackass’s wife could not help but ask us what they were. He glared at her as if her talking to us might give her a case of the gay.
He barked at the waiter to bring his check. They had barely finished eating. While I didn’t clap when he left, I did chuckle loudly.
And speaking of married couples, I mentioned I’d been a twee busy of late. The GF and I are in the process of planning a commitment ceremony. Now, now, no ugly emails about burying the lead.
The announcement comes lately and quietly in the post for a reason. It’s going to be a very quiet event. The GF and I are, as a friend quipped, not exactly people people. We’re having a very small ceremony with just family at my parents' home. We plan to celebrate big with friends a little later on this summer.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Fighting Prop 8
Arguments went before the California Supreme Court to overturn Proposition 8 Thursday. California’s gay marriage ban is being closely watched by Gay Rights Advocates and opponents alike. Interviewed on NPR Thursday morning, San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom remarked that Prop 8 is dangerous because it took away rights from the 18,000 gay and lesbian couples married while gay marriage was legal in the state.
Newsom asserts that is a dangerous precedent to set, "If in this country a simple majority of people can start stripping away the rights of a protected class in the minority, that's a pretty alarming thing," Newsom said.
The backlash to Prop 8 was swift. Gay Rights Advocates protested loudly, and when the listed of donors to supporters of Prop 8 was published, the protesting and boycotting got specific.
Donors interviewed were shocked when their businesses that had thriving gay client bases suddenly dried up and picketers showed up. Once person even said he was surprised because they previously had good relations with gay customers.
To which I can only reply, “Really.”
Major donors to campaigns are always reported. This is not new. And if you expected to support something that controversial and not show up in the news you’re just about too dumb to breathe.
There are a lot of gay folk in California. They also have good deal of disposable income. Sadly they didn’t spend it working to defeat Prop 8, but at least they’re voting with their dollars now and probably in a way that is far more detrimental to gay rights opponents.
Newsom asserts that is a dangerous precedent to set, "If in this country a simple majority of people can start stripping away the rights of a protected class in the minority, that's a pretty alarming thing," Newsom said.
The backlash to Prop 8 was swift. Gay Rights Advocates protested loudly, and when the listed of donors to supporters of Prop 8 was published, the protesting and boycotting got specific.
Donors interviewed were shocked when their businesses that had thriving gay client bases suddenly dried up and picketers showed up. Once person even said he was surprised because they previously had good relations with gay customers.
To which I can only reply, “Really.”
Major donors to campaigns are always reported. This is not new. And if you expected to support something that controversial and not show up in the news you’re just about too dumb to breathe.
There are a lot of gay folk in California. They also have good deal of disposable income. Sadly they didn’t spend it working to defeat Prop 8, but at least they’re voting with their dollars now and probably in a way that is far more detrimental to gay rights opponents.
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